No, I didn't fall off the face of the earth. Still alive. Still kicking. I had to take a bit of time for myself to transition a few things in my life to the next level, and deal with the passing of two people close to me. (One of which I already memorialized)
It's been a busy time full of.. unexpected things. Opportunities taken, and friendships lost. Don't cry for me too hard, Argentina, the truth is they weren't actually friendly. It was a lot like thinking some strange infection you had was your best buddy from down the block. A little embarrassing, and when cured a lot less itchy.
|Sometimes it is hard to know|
what will bring you up
and what will take you down.
Deb had spoken at length in the past about leveling up. The funny thing about leveling up is that after a while, if you keep doing it, new areas of the map open up. New areas with new challenges, better loot, and new skills. Skills you need to get better at quick, because you never know what is around the next corner.
The you that watches from behind your eyes is a Gamer. The Game is always going on. Leela, the Great Game. Power Gamer, Rules Lawyer, Method Actor, Lurker, Storyteller.. pick your poison, pick your pleasure. Look at your sheet, take stock of your inventory, get your head in the game.
It just takes vigilance. That watcher behind your eyes cant be asleep at the wheel, because the better you do, the higher the stakes. One minute you are busting local pottery for coins, and collecting turkey feathers for someone in your village; the the next you are plotting how to take down a rampaging Terrasque. (Hint: use ribbons.)
When you grow, you must have space to grow into, or you'll be trapped in a place, a world too small, choking on your own excreta. It's why you don't shit where you eat. When the space grows, you must grow to fit it, or be fast and clever enough to survive in a new world full of new things bigger and badder than you.. for now.
Your old tricks may not work anymore. There is the danger of relying on them.
Most of all you need to be brave. Braver than you thought you could be. And I know just saying this, is a signal to someone, somewhere, to test that bravery.
|Funny, this doesn't look like Provence|
You have a unique place here, you can do something no one else can do. You are a hero, a Vira, on your way to becoming a Divya, a God.
I know, it may sound a little much, a little ham fisted. I may be chewing the scenery a bit, but it's none the less true.
A new life phase can be scary. Great change can be scary. A lot has changed, and to be absolutely honest, I was terrified. Change, good or bad, inspires a deep terror. Something primal in us, something lizardy, primal, dragony, Terrasque-y does not want anything to change, ever. And when things that rip you up are paired with things that build you up, it can be hard to know which way is up.
When I was a kid I almost drowned in a pool. Silly place to almost drown, I know. I thrashed and I tried to swim, but I couldn't tell where the air was until I stayed still and felt myself float. Then I knew.. what way was up. The more I fought the more air I lost. The more I fought, the deeper I sank. In water you float. Naturally.
Now, my personal journey may be absolutely fascinating to you. Then again, this could all be absolute gibberish. You've born with me this long, so bare with me just a little while longer, because this concerns you. Not the general you. You.
Did you think I was speaking generally all this time?
If you haven't had that conscious experience of leveling, of being turned to liquid in your chrysalis and coming out as something new, make no mistake, it's coming.
Why? Because you want it to. Because no matter what, it is what you are working towards. When you get what you've worked for, and reap the fruits of your labor, it's a new, and grander set of challenges.
And something in you will rebel, and you will need some advice on your way.
Vigilance. Openness. Naturalness.
Use ribbons, but don't kill it. It's a mount too valuable to waste.