Sunday, August 5, 2012

Moving the Fulcrum

Where do we put the fulcrum to move the Mind?
"Give me a lever and a fulcrum, and I can move the universe." -Achemides

For most of my life my relationship with money has been poor to say the least. I grew up working class on the lower end, but we never lacked for necessities like food, water, shelter, etc. Though, admittedly it might have been a bit of a struggle to pay for all of those things in a timely manner AND save. When you have less, you can generally be conditioned to accept less. You would think that would lead to a spartan sensibility where I would live simply and have a Scrooge MacDuck like money bin to roll around in to ease my weary head at night. That.. was not the case for most of my life. Most of my expendable income was spent on books, spiritual knowledge, materia, and of course moving around. Moving around a lot.

I would say that my relationship with wealth was downright abusive, on both ends. There was a kind of disdain to wealth, and "those people" who had it. They were the oppressors! They were "the man", keeping us down! Fuck those guys! I'll show them! I'll work as a barista and show them! I'll not venture out of the gruff but honest working class world, not be a blip on the radar, and continue to be irrelevant! That surely will make positive change in the world.

I learned from Jason's latest offering that my set point was low. Very low for a person living in the Garden State. To quote one of my dearest friends who also grew up on the gruff blue collar end of the spectrum, "Do not think of 100k a year as some pie in the sky. 100K a year is shit in New Jersey. It's average. Don't think that is a lot of money. " Keep in mind that this is a woman who regularly attends gala events at the MET and lives like Riot Grrl Old World Royalty on money she made on her own, in this lifetime. Her set point is very high, but she keeps plowing ahead till she achieves it. It's inspirational, but it is easily tempting to see someone like that and discount yourself. People do it all the time. I did. Because she was ALWAYS that motivated. I suppose when you decide at twenty that you find working to be an unacceptable use of time and would rather go to the Opera instead and stick to it, you build up a lot of momentum.

Now what I find most inspirational has been Deb's own self work. Her family comes from the other end of the working class spectrum, but not yet to the money at which most of our state lives. The change has been dramatic. Spectacular and dramatic. In a very good way. I will be honest, I was nervous at first. Change is scary. Change in your life partner can be SUPER scary. Change in your life partner's relationship to life, wealth, and everything can be TERRIFYING if you don't also step up and join them. Especially if you are used to slightly living above the poverty line. As scary as it has been, it has also been incredibly inspiring, as I've SEEN her change, day by day, for the better. If I wanted to, I could probably make a chart. The Lady does good work.

Unbeknownst to me, we had both been intent on changing our own set points before we even recognized it as a concept. It came from looking at the line we had drawn in the sand in regards to wealth, seeing where it could be, and moving it to where we WANT it to be.

Deb, being herself, dove in first. I however was very busy. Super busy. Too busy. Didn't Gordon say something about that? So, two days ago I decided to do my portion of the work. It worked well in fact. I kindled my inner fires and really moved shit around. I processed, refined, and rearranged. I didn't take out old machinery, and replace it. I transmuted poison into nectar. I found my Star and allowed its Light to transmute how I manifest! I healed a disease of the Mind!

And then I threw up. Seriously. For some reason the success of this working was punctuated with sleeplessness, nightmare, fever, and one hell of a session of involuntary purging starting at around 4:30 AM. Out with the old, and in with the new.
For Great Justice.

As I am a terrible sick person, I automatically become convinced that I will be dead soon. My sudden onset illness really cemented that new set point into place. It was now fundamentally unjust that I must do X, Y, and Z for wealth, and wasting what wealth I had were equally unjust. Justice, btw, is one of the only ways I can connect to Jupiter, usually.

On the flip side, most of my Gods and Patron/Matrons are travelers, scoundrels, drop outs, and dope fiends. But, they know how to hustle. Working harder is not the answer. Working hard, finding leverage, and exploiting the hell out of it is working smarter. The more leverage you have, the less hard you have to lift.

I can sum up with a quote: "In a world without clear leadership how do you invest?" -Merryl Lynch Ad Campaign

You invest in yourself and your community. The Old Guard is waning. Too much control degrades to a loss of control. Stick, move, exploit weakness, and carve yourself a palace of Chaos out of the Giants of Stagnation. 


Deborah Castellano said...

You need a share this button. I also really love the convos that ritual/viral sickness bring up:

You: The chicken . . .
Me: There is no way you've been food poisoned four times this year unless you've been eating out a dumpster and licking said dumpster.
You: No, I haven't.
Me: Well, then.

My catcha number is 124 btw.

Pyrocephalis said...

Great post, Jow. I can relate completely. Set points are a bitch to change.

Anonymous said...

I don't know that you need a "share this" button, but this is awesome. It's more proof (as if I needed any) that I need to read Financial Sorcery soon. Fortunately, I've acquired the book today at my local friendly pagan store, and I get to figure out my set point and such... as well as where I'd like it to be.

All the same, I hope I have it easier than you. :-)