Moving, admittedly pushes every wrong button with me. It hits very deep security issues, money issues, abandonment issues.. pretty much all of my issues, all at once.
Many times we're tempted to think that we're done. That we can stop trying and just coast. Sadly that ain't so. I find that it is a generational thing. I am a cusp Gen X/Gen Y -er. And most of us are slackers, generally confused, and performing way below our potential. We're not used to doing much of anything. To quote KMFDM: "We're waiting for something worth waiting for."
I'd like to take this opportunity to talk about commitment. It's a fundamental virtue. It's more than just follow through, through it entails that. It's being so dedicated to your goal that you WILL keep trying until you inevitably succeed, because damn it you are DOING this. Whatever "this" happens to be. It is also something that many folks of my generation, and anyone who is raised without responsibility lack, generally.
Commitment covers two of the virtues of the Sphinx: To Dare, and To Will. You are either on the bus, or off the bus. One side of the road or the other. Something I think was frustrating for my Dad when I was a teenage goth kid, was that I didn't really commit to much, and if you want to be a functioning adult who does..well.. anything.. you have to fucking commit to it.
How does this tie in to magic? YOU HAVE TO COMMIT! Decide what you are doing! If you want to sit and be an armchair mage, that is totally groovy. You will have a large library, and a wealth of technical info that will help others. Hell, go into publishing source materials or anthologies! You do that thing!
But if you are going to be a practicing worker of Magic you need to really commit to doing that. This isn't something to squeeze into your schedule, or dominate it to the exclusion of all else. If you are doing that you aren't making the real lifestyle change necessary. "Think like a mage!" one of my best friends and mentors would tell me. When you commit, you start to think like a Mage. It weaves spiritual practice seamlessly into your life, like brushing your teeth, or showering, or cooking dinner. When you commit to something you deepen your relationship with it to the point that it changes you, and that is the point.
It happens all the time, unconsciously, with someone who has a steady career path. Admin's know how to organize events and people, using much the same skills as a nanny. People in health care tend to see the worlds problems as disease and solutions as treatment. My dad had an Engineer's mind, and would tackle life problems as engineering problems.
When you start to think like a Mage you start to treat the world as spellwork, and working with it at that level. Not just casting a spell when needed, but seeing the flow of energy and patterns as they unfold within nature and in individual lives. All of that comes from Commitment, and Commitment means throwing away the box that an idea comes in, and actually using it. Don't keep your magic on the shelf. Commit!
If this post is overly rambly, I do apologise. I am sleep deprived, injured, and still int he midst of moving, despite all the buttons pushed and issues dredged, but I am committed. This will work. As I Will it, so mote it be.